作者: system

Getting sick after blowing air conditioning, how can we strengthen children’s immune system?

Source: Senior Nutritionist, Ng Yiu Fun 

Many children and their parents go outdoors in the summer and feel very hot afterwards, so they want to go into the shopping mall to enjoy the air conditioning. At this time, if someone sneezes, children are easily susceptible to catching a cold or flu. How should parents deal with this problem? The first part is how to take care of them, and the other part is the diet to strengthen their immunity.

First of all, we should not enter the shopping mall immediately when it is too hot. When you are sweating a lot, you need to wipe off the sweat. In fact, sweat carries away the heat from our bodies, so the process of wiping off sweat makes it easier for the sweat to evaporate and carries away some of the heat from our bodies. It would be better for us to enter the shopping mall when our bodies are a little cooler.

Also, always be prepared with a jacket. Adults are the same; they need to have a shawl, which can be relatively better. On the other hand, if a child’s clothes are soaked, we should prepare an extra set of clothes to replace them, so that the clothes won’t stick to their back and cause them to catch a cold. In fact, the current towels are very long and can be placed on the back. After wiping the sweat with a towel, the clothes can remain dry.

In terms of diet, we can pay attention to whether children have a balanced diet. However, we must remember that children are picky eaters because they are still young, want to be independent, and have many opinions. But when we insist on letting them continue to try every food, even if they don’t eat it today, they can try it again another day. They may try it and get used to it after eating it many times, and then they will not be picky eaters. Perhaps the first time they try it, they may feel like vomiting just after putting it in their mouth, but it doesn’t matter because they have already tried the taste. But we can all be indomitable and keep trying.

In addition to having children eat their meals, I always recommend adding some millet to the rice when cooking because millet contains many different vitamins and minerals that can enhance the immune system, especially the rich vitamin B complex as well as calcium and iron. Also, remember to eat all kinds of vegetables and fruits; don’t just focus on studying and forget to eat fruits. Vitamin C can also help us increase our immunity.

Having such things can help children build a foundation, and we don’t need to take supplements. because it’s difficult to know if supplements are taken in excess, especially now that many people are taking fish oil capsules. In fact, the amount of fish oil capsules may be too much, and it may cause the blood to become thinner.

Another issue is the source of fish, which may be at risk of pollution if we don’t know where it comes from. It’s better to eat fresh fish, and red snapper is rich in Omega-3 fatty acids.

Finally, you can cook some soup, which my own children drink and which helps to improve their immunity. They don’t often bring home sickness after school, nor do they often miss school. It’s called “soup with walnuts, cashews, and chestnuts.” I buy two ounces of walnuts, two ounces of cashews, and half a pound of chestnuts, and I add some corn and carrots. You can also choose whether or not to include lean meat. Because it already has a sweet taste, the whole family can drink it, even babies over one year old, to strengthen their immunity and prevent illness.

小朋友做功課慢有甚麼原因？

資料來源：許龍傑醫生 

無論對小朋友或家長而言，做功課都是最大的問題，不是平日做功課，就算是暑假作業，很多家長都覺得很頭痛。家長經常和小朋友鬥法，於是令大家的關係變差，其實做功課慢這回事究竟成因是甚麼呢？其實做功課慢是有三種主要原因。

第一，過度活躍。小朋友經常跑來跑去，在家裡爬上爬下，由洗手間跑到廚房又跑到房間，跑來跑去，永遠都不會停止，像個摩托一樣走來走去。那麼你想一想如果要他做功課是多麼痛苦的一件事，你給他一張桌子及椅子，他永遠都坐不久。當他真的可以安定坐下來，他就會不停擺來擺去，身體不停擺動，就像屁股刺到一樣。

因為要開始做功課，一拿起筆便說要到洗手間，去完小便又說要大便，之後又說肚子餓要吃東西，永遠都有藉口要離開椅子。一坐下來直到可以安定做功課，往往需要1至2個小時，這個便稱為過度活躍。過度活躍的小朋友做功課一定慢，不過並不是做得慢，而是較慢才能安定下來。

年紀較大的例如中學生，又或是高小生，他們不一定會跑來跑去，但他們很多時候會抖腿，不停地抖，抖得整張桌子都在動。又例如轉筆，不停地轉、轉來轉去。你不要小看這些抖腿、轉筆及擺動身體的動作，其實這些都是過度活躍的症狀。

第二，專注力弱。專注力不足的小朋友或許可以坐定，但他看著你就像一朵雲

做白日夢，完全不知道自己在做甚麼，拿著鉛筆又看著功課，就只是看著，永遠都不能吸收第一條題目。於是他們或可以坐定，但會一直停留在第一條題目，永遠都是在做第一條，然後電話聲響會去看一下，門鐘響又會看一下，永遠都不能專心。

有一些家長向我們投訴，如果是過度活躍的小朋友，在首1個小時便要走來走去；專注力不足的小朋友在首個小時都在做夢，要到第2個小時才能繼續做下去，而且會做得很慢。

第三，讀寫能力弱。大家或許已聽過讀寫障礙，讀寫障礙是一些較嚴重的個案，但有些小朋友不算是讀寫障礙，但他的讀寫能力很弱，讀寫能力是包括中文、英文及數學，包括了讀和寫，他唸下去好像很困難，不知為何同一個詞語，很簡單而已，永遠都不能記進腦裡。寫字永遠都是反過來的，左右會反過來，就像一面鏡子，還有一些會上下倒轉。

這類型的小朋友是可以坐定，吩咐他們坐下便會坐定，也會很專注，但是他們會怎麼樣呢？他們會坐著做功課，但做得滿頭大汗。不過做完以後，每一條題目都是錯的，每樣都記不下來又不懂，這就可能是讀寫問題，引致做功課慢。

剛剛說過三個原因，究竟是哪一種呢？當然有些小朋友三種都有，但如果家長能留意一下，不要只責罵小朋友。當他做得慢的時候，先留意小朋友是三種之中的哪一種。如果知道他屬於哪種原因，那時候我們要對症下藥便能事半功倍了。

吹一吹冷氣就病 如何可以增強小朋友免疫力？

資料來源：資深營養師吳耀芬 

很多小朋友及家長在夏天時，也會有些戶外活動，隨後會感到很熱，於是就想進入商場享受冷氣。在這個時候一個打噴嚏，小朋友很容易就患上感冒傷風。家長應如何去處理這種問題呢？我們可以分為兩部份，第一部份就是如何護理他們，另一部分是飲食方面，增強小朋友的抵抗力。

首先，在進入商場前，我們不應在太熱的時候立即進入。當有很多汗的時候，需要抹乾汗水。其實汗水會帶走我們身上的熱，所以在抹汗過程中，就可以令汗液更容易揮發，亦可以帶走我們身上一部分的熱力。當身體涼快一點，我們才走進商場會更加好。

另外，要隨時準備一件外套。大人都一樣 需要有披肩，披肩會相對好一點。另一方面，小朋友衣服濕透了，我們都應預備多一件衣服可以替換，讓衣服不會濕漉漉地黏著背部使他著涼。其實現時的汗巾都很長，可以放在背上，拿出汗巾抹汗後，衣服都能保持乾爽。

在飲食方面，我們可以注意小朋友有沒有一個均衡的飲食。但要謹記小朋友必有偏食情況，因為他們還小，同時想獨立自主會有很多意見。但是當我們堅持

每樣食物都給他們繼續嘗試，今天不吃，改天再繼續嘗試，他可能會嘗試吃，吃多了並習慣後就不會出現偏食的情況。可能嘗試的那一次，只是剛放進口就覺得想吐出來都不要緊，因為他已經嘗試過味道。但大家都可以有不屈不撓的精神繼續嘗試。

除了我們要小朋友吃飯，我都會建議加一些小米來煲飯，因為小米有很多種不同的維他命和礦物質，可以增強抵抗力，尤其擁有豐富的維他命B雜，也有鈣質和鐵質。另外，也要緊記吃所有的蔬菜水果，不只要顧著讀書上學，卻忘記吃水果。而維他命C都會幫助，我們增加抵抗力。

當然還有肉類，但其實份量不用太多，過多反而會增加，肝臟和腎臟的負擔，那要多少份量才足夠呢？譬如 2至3歲小朋友，大約食一個半廣東麻雀大小的份量已經足夠，不用吃整塊豬扒那麼大塊的份量才算是足夠。每天一至兩杯奶，也是很好的「超級食物」，因為奶本身集合多種營養素，我們稱為全能食物。

有這樣東西就能幫助小朋友建立基礎，而我們亦不需要進食補充劑。因為補充劑 難免不會知道是否過量，尤其是現時很多人流行吃魚油丸，其實魚油丸本身份量是可能過多，血便容易薄了。

另外一個問題是來源 不知從何而來的魚，可能有污染的危機。如果能吃新鮮的魚就比較好，紅衫魚都有很多的（Omega-3）脂肪酸在內。

最後可以煲一些湯水，這個湯水是我自己小朋友都會喝的，喝後抵抗力較好，不會經常在上學後帶病回家，也不會經常不能上學，就是「合桃腰果栗子湯」。我會買二両合桃、二両腰果 、半磅栗子加些粟米紅蘿蔔，放或不放瘦肉也可以。因為已有很甜的味道，這個湯其實一家大小都能喝，就算是嬰兒一歲以上也可以喝，就能增強抵抗力而不容易生病。

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家長園地 家長園地 家長園地 家長園地 家長園地

教養孩子出現分歧時 緊記「迴避不可恥且有用」

資料來源：家庭動力心理治療師阮慧敏 

在親子互動裡，父母的成長背景、教育程度或者原生家庭都有不同，所以基本上父母對某件事有不同的看法，其實是很正常的。

當真的有不同意見時，父母應找一個平靜的環境，互相傾談自己的角度，各自對問題的看法。無論在甚麼情況下，我們都不希望，父母在孩子面前直接爭吵。舉個例子爸爸可以對媽媽解釋：「我自己不開心的時候或工作壓力大時，我都會用手機發洩及減壓，所以我會覺得小朋友玩手機是沒有問題的。」

而太太也可以對丈夫表示：「其實我希望你支持我，很希望你能夠諒解，其實我照顧小朋友也是很辛苦的。」大家可以在一個平靜及平等的環境下先商量。其實在親職的環境裡，父母的步伐必須一致的。

舉個例子爸媽就好像在跳舞，爸爸踏前，媽媽就要退後。爸爸舉高雙手，媽媽就要轉圈，這是一個很自然的步伐。如果能夠配合得這麼順暢，不只跳舞的二人能樂在其中，甚至是旁邊的觀舞者也會陶醉在舞蹈中。但是如果大家各不相讓，一個人踏前，另一個人也要踏前，另一個人希望你能夠配合，而你卻只堅持自己的立場，怎樣都不配合，這場舞蹈就一點也不精彩。

 

在家庭的環境裡，小朋友往往就是最忠實與忠心的觀舞者，永遠站在大堂中央位置觀看爸媽怎樣去跳舞。所以如果父母跳得一團糟，這位觀舞者也會坐立不安，而整個氣氛也會緊張起來，問題也會更加多，在舞池的爸媽也會互相踐踏

踐踏得更痛。

當真的出現水火不容的情況，父母各持己見，鬧得怒火中燒。我們會提議隨便一方離開現場，不是輸贏和面子的問題，而是讓大家透透氣，伸展一下。大家在家庭環境裡不是一種角力，因為受害者必定會是小朋友。所以在家庭環境裡

如果父母是怒火中燒各不相讓時，其實有一方需要先退下來，調理一下怒火離開現場，這樣會比較好一點。

小朋友過分沉迷手機遊 家長要如何處理？

資料來源：家庭動力婚姻及家庭治療師、催眠治療師黃思明

 

電話發出光芒與聲音，總會吸引小朋友玩過不停。有些小朋友無論甚麼時候，不論是吃飯、搭車和上學，都機不離手。家長可以如何解決這問題呢？

 

首先，大家要明白小朋友的反應是必然的，手機可以提供很多感官的刺激，也沒有gameover，可以重新開始，有成功感，也可以遠離父母、學校的壓力和挫敗感，根本就是無敵。從生理學來說，玩電子遊戲是會令大腦釋放大量的多巴胺，給前額葉皮層令人興奮、刺激，並漸漸會失去了自我控制能力，所以有很多成人都不能夠控制，何況小朋友呢？

 

小朋友也會不自覺被吸引，造成現在香港大部分父母的惡夢。我看見很多父母和小朋友，都陷入一個無窮的鬥爭和挫敗。如果不加以控制，不單止對小朋友的學習有影響，更嚴重是會影響他們的專注力、腦袋的發展、健康和眼睛的疾病。因此手機成癮也將會像酒和毒品一樣，被列為其中一種心理成癮病。

 

事實上我曾見過一個初中生，他沉迷打野戰遊戲「食雞」，他時時要在地上執起一些物資，但這些物資有時候會有陷阱會爆炸的。他入醫院的原因是甚麼？

是他不能用手拿著東西，他可以碰下碰下，他會很緊張。因為只要他用手指拿東西就會很害怕。所以你現在發現問題，便可以早些處理，避免出現以上情況。

 

家長比孩子有更加多經驗、智慧及資源，你不可能會輸的，你唯一的弱點就是你太愛他。你會心軟，要知道給很容易要收卻很難，所以家長應該要先和小朋友協商一個合理可行的方案，譬如一日可玩30分鐘，但要先完成家課。

 

至於控制小朋友，首先要選擇適合的戰埸，不要在公眾場所，最合適的就是在家中。即使收也要盡量避免身體接觸，好像搶、拔電線這些應該要盡量避免，因為會傷感情。家長要先用溫柔肯定的語調，警告他很多次。如果他還不肯交出，你便要提醒孩子他已經同意的後果，到最後他睡了你一定可以收到的。但就要堅持堅定執行後果，沒有商量的餘地，這些就是較為負面的策略。

 

更正面的是為小朋友提供，可以吸引他離開手機的機會，例如和小朋友一起進行戶外活動，提供一個家庭環境，給小朋友有得選擇、有成功感、有重新開始的機會，建立他的自信和能力。

 

最後很多父母因為其他小朋友有手機，如果自己的沒有，擔心小朋友有比較

甚至會引起自卑，有些擔心小朋友會比其他人學得慢，將來可能會影響他的發展。因此我知道現實是不可能不給小朋友接觸手機的，所以我提議愈小愈應該避免使用手機，盡量拖遲他們進入這個世界。

 

同時家長也要把握機會小心處理，不可以掉以輕心。只要父母夠創意，多些和小朋友有互動和陪伴，夠堅持便可以改變小朋友。

When there are differences in parenting, remember that avoidance is not shameful and can be useful.

Source:  Family Dynamic Psychotherapist, Yuen Wai Man

 

Parents’ upbringing backgrounds, education levels, or family of origin may differ in parent-child interaction, so it is quite normal for parents to have differing opinions on something.

When there are indeed different opinions, parents should find a calm environment to discuss their own perspectives and views on the problem. In any situation, we don’t want parents to argue directly in front of their children. For example, Dad can explain to Mom, “When I’m unhappy or under work pressure, I use my phone to vent and reduce stress, so I don’t think it’s a problem for kids to play with phones.”

And the wife can also express this to her husband: “Actually, I hope you can support me and understand that taking care of children is also very difficult for me.” Everyone can discuss calmly and equally in a peaceful environment. In fact, in the parenting environment, parents’ steps must be consistent.

Parents, for example, are like dancing partners in parenthood. When the father steps forward, the mother should step back. When the father raises his arms, the mother should spin around. This is a natural rhythm. If they can work together effectively, not only the dancing couple but also the onlookers can enjoy the dance. But if everyone insists on their own stance without compromise, the dance will be a mess.

In the family environment, children are often the most faithful and loyal audience, always standing in the center of the hall watching how their parents dance. So if the parents dance poorly, the audience will also be restless, the atmosphere will become tense, and more problems will arise. On the dance floor, parents will also trample on each other, causing more pain.

If there is a situation where the parents cannot see eye to eye and are in a heated argument, we would suggest that one of them leaves the scene. It’s not a matter of winning or losing or saving face, but rather allowing everyone to catch their breath and take a break. In a family environment, it’s not a competition between parents because the real victim will always be the child. So when parents are in a heated argument and cannot compromise, one of them should step back, cool down, and leave the scene. This would be better for everyone involved.

How should parents deal with young children who are overly addicted to cell phone games

Source: Family Dynamic, Marriage and Family Therapist, and Hypnotherapist, Wong Shi Ming

 

Phones emit light and sound, which always attracts children to play endlessly. Some children cannot let go of their phones no matter what they are doing, whether it is eating, riding in a car, or going to school. How can parents solve this problem?

 

First of all, everyone should understand that the children’s reaction is inevitable. Phones can provide a lot of sensory stimulation, and there is no game over. It can be restarted, which gives a sense of accomplishment and can also distance children from the pressure and frustration of parents and school, making them feel invincible. Physiologically speaking, playing electronic games will release a large amount of dopamine in the brain, which excites and stimulates the frontal lobe, and gradually loses self-control. Therefore, many adults cannot control themselves, let alone children?

 

Children can also be drawn to phones without realizing it, which gives most parents in Hong Kong nightmares today. I see many parents and children caught in a never-ending cycle of struggle and frustration. If not controlled, it not only affects children’s learning but also seriously affects their focus, brain development, health, and eye diseases. Therefore, phone addiction will also be listed as a form of psychological addiction, like alcohol and drugs.

 

In fact, I have seen a middle school student addicted to playing the mobile game “PUBG,” where he had to pick up items on the ground, some of which could be booby-trapped and explode. What caused him to be hospitalized? He was unable to use his hands to hold objects; instead, he had to touch them lightly, which caused him to feel nervous. He was afraid of using his fingers to pick up things. Therefore, if you discover such a problem, you can handle it early and prevent situations like the one above from happening.

Parents have more experience, wisdom, and resources than their children, and you can’t lose as a parent. Your only weakness is that you love your child too much. You may be too soft-hearted, but you need to know that it’s easy to give but hard to take it back. Therefore, parents should first negotiate a reasonable and feasible plan with their children, such as allowing 30 minutes of playtime per day, but only after they finish their homework.

As for controlling children, parents should first choose an appropriate battlefield, avoiding public places, and the best place is at home. Even when taking the phone away, parents should try to avoid physical contact, such as snatching or unplugging the phone cord, which could harm the relationship with their child. Parents should first use a gentle and affirmative tone to warn their child multiple times. If the child still refuses to hand over the phone, remind him of the consequences he agreed to, and eventually, when he falls asleep, you will be able to retrieve it. But parents must firmly execute the consequences without any room for negotiation, even if it means resorting to negative strategies.

To provide a more positive approach, parents can offer opportunities for their children to engage in outdoor activities together and create a family environment that gives children options, a sense of achievement, and a chance to start over, building their confidence and abilities, all of which can help attract children away from their phones.

Finally, many parents worry that if their child doesn’t have a phone while other children do, it could lead to feelings of inadequacy and concerns about falling behind in their development. So, I know it’s not possible to keep kids away from phones completely, but I think parents should try to keep their kids away from phones for as long as possible, especially when they’re young.

At the same time, parents should be careful and not take this issue lightly. With enough creativity and interaction with their children and by remaining persistent, parents can change their children’s habits.

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家長園地 家長園地 家長園地 家長園地 家長園地

Whole milk is unhealthy? Dispelling the myth of milk drinking!

Written by: Senior Dietitian, Ng Yiu Fun

There are many different types of milk on the market, with different flavors or UHT milk   that can be stored at room temperature. There are also many myths about milk consumption. Some people think that “whole milk is unhealthy” or “skim milk has chemicals.” How do we choose the right milk for our children?

The first thing we should be aware of is that boxed milk is refrigerated at -4 degrees         Celsius. Why should it be refrigerated? Because boxed milk does not completely kill all the bacteria, after it has been stored for 10 or 8 days, the milk will begin to expire and cannot    be consumed. Therefore, you must be careful not to drink fresh milk that has expired; otherwise, you will easily get gastroenteritis.

As for low-fat, whole milk, and skim milk, there are some rumors that whole milk is         unhealthy or skim milk has chemical ingredients. In fact, this problem does not exist. First of all, since children are also divided into too light, too heavy, or standard body types, we have to look at our children’s body types to choose different milks, even if skim, whole milk are, in fact, full of nutrition.

For example, whole milk is suitable for children who are too light. They really need fat, so they can drink whole milk. It may be asked if some animal fats are not as good for the blood vessels. For children, their blood vessels are very elastic, and the fat in whole milk is not really that high, so an appropriate amount of whole milk is good for them and will not  harm their bodies. If the child is too light, two packs of milk a day are not a problem at all.

For overweight children, we recommend skim milk. If it’s skim milk, we save less fat in    other areas, such as not drinking so much soup, not eating so many juicy dishes, or not eating so many snacks. All these can help him not become overweight so easily. If an overweight child wants more calcium and different nutrients, one packet of skim milk a day is   enough!

Thousands of lies to avoid doing homework. What should parents do?

Written by: Family Dynamics, Psychological Counselor, Lai Shun Mei

Every time a child does homework, he or she falsely claims to have a stomachache, to go to the bathroom, or to go to sleep—thousands of lies and excuses. Parents who value character development are naturally outraged because they have zero tolerance for dishonesty in their children. But why do children always avoid doing their homework? Why do they have to lie to cover it up?

Often, children avoid doing homework not because they don’t want to, but because they can’t. Children want to be good and smart, but when they find out they can’t do their homework, they think they are not smart enough. When they find out they can’t do their homework, they think they are not smart enough. They can’t accept this and will lie to cover it up and avoid it. Generally speaking, children with normal intelligence but learning disabilities will have their academic performance affected to some degree, but they can perform well in other areas as well. Regardless of their intelligence level, with the right     approach and the right amount of training, they will be able to develop the appropriate skills.

But why do people tell lies? When a person feels that he or she is in an uncomfortable      situation, he or she will activate the defense mechanism to protect himself or herself. Lying is one of the ways to escape a crisis. If parents want to help their children, they need to give them the courage to tell the truth so that they can understand what their children really don’t understand.

How do you get your child to be brave enough to tell the truth? You need to let your child know that even if he or she is not smart enough, you will still love him or her so much, take pleasure in him or her, be patient with him or her, and work together to help him or her solve their problems, thus building his or her sense of security and giving him or her  the peace of mind to reveal his or her innermost doubts and difficulties. But on the contrary, if his experience makes him think that he is not smart enough, which will lead to his mother’s anger and complaints, he will not dare to tell the truth and even activate his     self-protection mechanism to protect himself with lies that adults can uncover at first glance.

Not only will the child be unable to protect himself, but he will also get into more trouble  because the mother will be rehabilitated and will admit her fault and promise not to lie again. But in fact, his homework difficulties are not solved, creating a vicious cycle. Therefore, we encourage parents to learn to accept their children’s shortcomings so that they will have confidence in you and feel safe to open up to you.

Before becoming enraged at their children, parents should ask themselves these three questions

Written by: Caritas Rehabilitation Services,Clinical Psychologist, Yu Kwok Ting

Some parents may be more impulsive and even have a habit of blaming their children for  problems such as disobedience, deliberate anger, or naughtiness. When children fail to do  what they want, they become angry with their parents, but this will gradually alienate them from their parents, which will damage the parent-child relationship in the long run.

Parents’ personalities, families of origin, and parenting methods learned in different ways  will affect parent-child relationships. And the adults’ thoughts will influence their mood. If adults find themselves in frequent conflicts with children, which affect the parent-child      relationship, we can ask ourselves three questions.

  • Whether there are other possibilities

If a child is not able to do all the homework required by his or her parents, the first thing   the parents think is that the child is just having fun and not doing homework, but the real    reason may be that they do not know how to do it and need parental guidance. If parents    take preconceived notions as facts, they may ignore the needs and difficulties of their children and damage the parent-child relationship.

  1. Whether one’s own thoughts have been confirmed

Some parents often say that their child is “deliberately annoyed” and then see their child’s  behavior as disobedience, but perhaps the reason for the child’s behavior is carelessness,    but the parents are influenced by their subjective feelings and misunderstand their child.

 

  1. Are your thoughts helpful to the goal?

If a parent’s goal is to mend the parent-child relationship, but he or she often holds the idea that the child is “deliberately working against him or her,” is this thinking really helpful to his or her goal? Parents can try to find more realistic and justifiable ideas to help them      achieve their goals.